Gravity, It's a great thing. It's what keeps us grounded.On most days that's a great thing. However once in a while we can all come down with a hard case of it. On those days you mostly wish gravity didn't exist.
My case in point. Just a normal Sunday night, was taking the dogs outside to potty, one of the usual things I try to accomplish before bed.
When I being the chicken that I am, heard a noise in the woods.
Now these are not just regular woods, these are scary dark woods. And we all know what's in scary dark woods right? Scary dark things.... exactly
So I being the brave person that I am, scooped up the puppy and ran inside. Then suddenly from nowhere, GRAVITY just hit me. Like a ton of bricks even.
I just collapsed. I tried not to fall on the poor puppy so I kinda half threw him into the house, while I landed in a big mess on the back porch.
Though hurt as I was, there were still big dark scary things after me, so I continued into the house as fast as I could, and locked the door behind me of course.
Then and only then was I able to take an inventory of my injuries. My right leg was scraped from bottom to top. My left leg scraped and bruised, but wait, my right knee and ankle were beginning to double in size, slowly tripple in size. I knew that coudln't be good. So off to the ER I went.
But wait. Since we all know (except for Grandma Humecky lol) that the love of my life is waiting in limbo in TX to come home, that he wasn't here to drive me to the ER. And of course it was Sunday night at 11pm so the kids were asleep. There was no way Grandma Briggs would be able to drive me to the ER. How the heck was I going to get there.
Now we had a few options, A, I could drive myself. But how dangerous might that be, a maimed person trying to drive in an emergency...probly not good.
B, call and ambulance, now that is feasable, however after I get done at the ER, how does one get home?
...So we settled on option C, a late night call to our good friends and former visiting and home teachers. Without a moments hesitation, they were here to take me and my mangled leg to the ER.
A couple hours and few xrays later, we had a diagnosis. Not exactly the one I was hoping for but, a diagnosis none the less. I have a chip fracture of my distal fibula. In real peoples terms, a broken ankle. OK great, so what does that mean for me? Approximately 6 weeks in a cast, and the inability to chase after my kids. Super.
So I put a call into the Red Cross to see if I could get a message to my dear husband. They were nice enough to throw in my contact request, a request for him to be sent home to help care for our kids. Well great, I wasn't even expecting that. So a few hours later I get a call from my Dear love, he's calling to find out what exactly happened. So I had to relay the whole embarassing story to him, he chuckled, said he was sorry and he'll report back to his commander.
The commander apparently was asking him to get the story, and also asked very steernly"Humecky, did she do this just to get you home faster?" Are you for real? What kind of fool could purposely break their ankle, and for that matter who would even try? I guess someone super desperate. While I'll admit it half crossed my mind, wondering what it would take to get him home via the emergency red cross connection, but really was I ready for what that meant? No certainly not, I didn't want anything major enough to warrent emergent leave to happen. So I passed on that idea.
Any how, here I am drugged up, leg elevated on the couch, where I've been for the past two days. Wishing I wasn't so dang afraid of the dark
...The moral of the story...If one is afraid of the dark, It might be better to have your 7 year old who isn't afraid take the dog out.