Easter Come and Gone...phew

Easter is usually pretty stressful for me, I have to make sure the kids have easter clothes for church, baskets and that we have our family gtg, and then of course a yummy easter dinner. This year I put way less into the baskets as normal. The kids got new clothes still which I adore, and our family gtg went off pretty nicely.

The kids had a blast and the family time was great. I miss when my whole family used to get together and we'd all have fun. The next goal is to plan a get together before mom passes. I don't want it to be a sad time when all of us get together again. Last time we were all together it was at Dad's funeral, we didn't know how to act, we were happy we were together but sad Dad was gone. I want to know how to act and know it's ok to be happy when we are together...

Some times I feel like the blonde...

Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.The 10 pm news was coming on. The news crew was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll jump?" Bob said, "You know, I bet he'll jump.." The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!" Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money." Bob replied, "I can't take your money. I saw this earlier on the 5 pm news, and so I knew he would jump."

The blonde replied, "I did too, but didn't think he'd do it again."

Bob took the money...

Have you ever just wished something would come out different. No matter how hard you try though it just doesn't? As much as that poor blonde wanted that guy to not jump, he was always going to do it.

I just feel like the blonde sometimes.

Spring Break..

I wish I could spring break with my kiddos. I really think there are alot of things that could change in work structure and ethics. It should be perfectly acceptable to work only 2 days a week and get paid the same money. It should also be perfectly acceptable to have spring break and christmas break and summer vacation.

I know that the reality is tha'ts not happening unless I become a teacher but I really think it would be nice.

Or I'll get my dream and a fairy god mother will come around and let me be a SAHM again

Any how, my fantabulous mom is with the kids this week, they are planning a trip to the zoo with my sister and her girls, and maybe even the pool. i'm super jealous

More funny stories.

Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - The last one is great!
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could Immediately take the words back...
Or that you could crawl into a hole?
Here are the Testimonials of a few! people who did....


FIRST TESTIMONY:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow
and asked loudly, 'How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?'
I turned around and walked back out and never went back.
My husband didn't say a word... He knew better.


SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store.
He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said,
'I think I like playing with men’s balls'


THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case,
the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help.
I replied, 'No, I'm just looking at your nuts.'
My sister started to laugh hysterically. The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.


FOURTH TESTIMONY :
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok . I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons.
I told her that if she did not start behaving 'right now' she would be punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, 'If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!' The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.


FIFTH TESTIMONY:
Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while. I asked him if he needed to go, and he said 'No'. I kept thinking 'Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me.' Then I said, 'Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?' 'No,' he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooo, I asked one more time, 'Danny did you have an accident? This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, Bent over, spread his cheeks, And yelled, 'SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!'
While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!


LAST BUT NOT LEAST TESTIMONY:
This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks.


What happens when you predict snow but don't get any? We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked:
'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?'


Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard !